the march note.

Hey hi hello,

I hope you’re doing well and that February treated you kindly. Speaking of February — love, growth, and all that jazz — I want to remind you of something important: people change.

Sometimes.

Now, don’t take that and run with it like I’m telling you to hold out hope for your toxic ex or that “friend” who’s only nice when it benefits them. No. Cut them off. A swift block, followed by immersing yourself in your own interests, will do wonders for your peace of mind.

What I mean is, you won’t always experience the version of someone you wish they could be. People evolve through different environments and experiences, and those changes are part of personal growth. When you’re constantly around people you’ve always known, it can be hard to work on yourself — especially if they’re not doing the same.

Getting out into the world adds layers to a person. Sometimes your presence reinforces someone’s patterns; other times, it takes distance for change to happen. But change can happen. And if you’ve tried everything, communicated openly, and nothing shifts? It might be time to walk away. Don’t back yourself into a corner trying to fix what isn’t yours to fix.

Growth requires space — that’s why we repot plants when they outgrow their containers. People are no different.

For example, if you want to start going to the gym, someone else isn’t going to magically want to join you unless they decide that for themselves. Maybe they’re just not ready yet. People need their own source of intrinsic motivation, and we’ve talked about this before. If you choose to go solo, you’re building habits that strengthen your independence. And whether you inspire them or not, you’ll be okay.

Also, try not to take it personally if they eventually start working out with someone else. It’s not a reflection of you — we’re all wired differently, with unique blends of brain chemistry, personality, and life experiences. Those factors shape what motivates us and when we feel ready to change.

This realization hit me hard in my early 20s, especially around friendship. Three of my biggest fears have always been feeling like a burden, being left behind, and unintentionally making others feel that way. I genuinely thought the friends I left high school with would be my forever people. When that didn’t pan out, I questioned whether I was just bad at socialising.

But university shifted my perspective. The person I saw in the mirror was social, courageous, kind, and reliable. I wasn’t lacking; I was just growing.

And so are you.

Let people evolve — and give yourself the freedom to do the same.

With love,